Surrender, Love

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The day comes
for our surrender,
which is never defeat;
would we ever call
the sun’s glorious drop
from our hope-filled view
a loss, a giving up, a forfeit?
Is the moon defeated
as she drapes the sky
with her incandescence,
emblazons passing clouds,
transgresses the borders
of the known and unknown,
taking us there with her
before ceding, with grace,
to the light of the coming day?
May I one day understand
that stillness is not death,
but the cessation of a mind
feeding itself on my burdens,
running me dry, tossing me out,
burning me to crumbling ash.
May I one day fall to earth,
feel the nourishment so deeply,
let the thoughts come
let the thoughts go,
and know, and trust
that in the silence
of the innermost part
of my being,
everything I need remains,
that in stillness, nothing is lost,
and there is room for this,
this love, to consume me.
– Tammy Takahashi
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Here is a Shadow

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here is a

shadow,

it is given

its shape

by another,

upon which it

is wholly

dependent.

as the sun

glides across

the sky,

watch the

shadow grow,

contract,

darken,

become more

obtuse.

revel in the

silhouette,

its illusion of

such sharp

and pristine

clarity.

ponder the

shadow,

dig deep,

consider it

from afar

and then

penetrate

its dark

depths,

as it is

the only

way back. – TS

Gazing the Shadow

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sometimes we wonder
about the shadows
 
the carelessness and
the whimsy of their reign
 
the way they cast a pall
of darkness yet move
 
so freely, appearing to dance
as they vibrate free of gravity’s
 
constraints, hardly tethered,
at all, to the plodding weight
 
of us, who birth the shadow long.
sometimes i want to free myself
 
of me, to freeze spacetime and
shed my contours, flatten and expand
 
as i lie down, right on top of my
shadow, no longer burdened with
 
the pulses and streams and biology
that catch in the light just so, and be
 
naked, and be with all that brilliant
sun without getting seared, and be
 
with the darkness without the fear,
and soak it up for holy reckoning
 
our shadows don’t need a chance
to play, but they do. may we dance
 
with our shadows, learn from their
lightness just how free we can be
 
when we enter the darkness
and truly learn how to see. – TS

I Need You

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i want to say,
the light soothes
every wound,
all the shadows
 
i want to say,
groping in the dark
is the path, the gateway
to our happy future
 
i want to feel,
always, the presence
of sunlight streaming
onto my quivering skin
 
even as i cling,
even as i know i am,
to sneaky corners
immune to light
 
but the words hide.
the dance is not
always near, or
hopeful, or ecstatic.
 
instead i say,
let’s do this together
it might not be pretty,
or redemptive
 
but it is here
and i need you
and maybe you
need me too. – TS

The Other Side of Darkness

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I close my eyes
and the darkness
reverberates in my head,
consuming the anticipation
that leaps playfully in the sun,
flapping like clothes in the breeze
on a midsummer’s day.
 
The darkness enfolds
as darkness can ably do,
in not letting up, in laying bare
its breadth and expansion,
unlike the clothes in the breeze,
the chasm deep, void and still,
fear’s restless homeland.
 
I squeeze my eyes shut,
and the landscape changes
to a show of spectral colors
not veiling the darkness within
but assuring: we are always
here to meet you. We are always
where your journey goes. – TS

Path to Light

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Notice how the eye
reaches first for the light,
how the heart sings
into the great distances
beyond, into the joy
that brightens our horizons.
Then, after resting
in ecstatic wonder,
now in repose,
the shadows come to view,
slowly, not before we
are ready, and we
do not succumb
to the darkness.
No, now we notice
how the shadows frame
our view, how they
pose no obstacle,
how they sift through
our consciousness,
soft tendrils of our
pained memories,
and how they give us
our path to light. – TS